• Conversations with Dr. Donna

    Secrets to Success: Not Overcompensating for Divorce

    Dr. Donna Housman       

    thumb_480862Many parents who have gone through a divorce feel guilty about it with their children and feel they need to compensate to try to spare their children any ill feelings whatsoever. If a teacher was disappointed in them, they come to the rescue. If they don’t win a race, they indulge them. Stepping in for them communicates you don’t have faith in them being able to handle things with just your guidance and support. It also communicates that there is always a safety net guarding against poor choice and doesn’t allow your child to learn from mistakes. How do we break this mindset?

    Statistics show that over 50% of marriages end in divorce. When parents can explain effectively that although mom and dad no longer love each other, they still do love their children very much and will always love them and be there for them, then overcompensating (for what?) becomes a moot point.

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